Team Member???

What the f*** is a 'team member'???

As a 'mature lady' in her later years of life, I am looking for a little part-time job in the local area.  Maximum 20 hours per week and I realise that I probably will only be paid minimum wage.  I'm happy with that.  All I want is a job that I can do for a few hours a week, leave at the end of my shift, go home and not have to worry about it until I go to work the following day.

Years ago it was really easy to pick up casual work.  One just walked into somewhere that one wanted to work and said, 'Give me a job', and that was it.  One had a job!  There was no contract to sign, no health & safety blurb to read, no talk of how much holiday pay you would get and pretty much no legal agreement on either side.

As a 'ranting middle aged spinster' I've just discovered that finding a job these days is a lot harder.  And I don't think it has anything to do with my age.

Take today for example.  I walked past the local Bakers shop and saw a sign in the window saying that they were looking for part-time staff.  Whoopeee doo I thought.  I can do that.  It may have been more than 35 years ago since I actually worked in a Bakers shop but how hard can it be?  OK so some of the bread may be gluten free or allergy free or actually not bread at all considering the number of allergies people have these days.  At the end of the day it's a job selling a few loaves of bread!!!

Anyway as I was looking quite smart and looked like a highly qualified interview candidate, I was on my way out to have a few drinks. Lol. I popped into the shop and asked the 'chewing gum, greasy haired, fat person, with stains all down her overall, behind the counter', what the part-time hours were and how I went about applying for the position.

'Chewing gum, greasy haired, fat person with stains all down her overall', said, 'Go on the website.  You can apply there.'  Not exactly the friendly customer service that I was hoping for???

......................So I went on the website.

And it turns out that the Bakers shop isn't actually looking for a 'shop assistant' to sell a loaf of bread.  It's looking for a 'team member'???  'Team Member'???  The shop only employs two people at a time - that's hardly a team?!!!

And before I actually got to the bit where it told me how to apply for the job I had to read through 4 pages of blurb describing what a 'team member' did.  Stuff about engaging with the customer and
upselling.  Ie, 'You've bought a sandwich.  Would you like to add a drink to that for an extra £1?'

Oh and while I'm on the subject of  stupid, stupid, job titles - 'Subway', the sandwich shop was looking for a sandwich maker.  Except Subway doesn't call their sandwich makers; sandwich makers.  Subway calls their sandwich makers - Sandwich Artists?!  For Gods sake - the whole point of Subway is that it sells sandwiches and pretty much nothing else.  Why can't they just advertise for a sandwich maker??

Anyway I digress.  After I'd ploughed my way through 4 pages of 'aims & objectives' I eventually got to the bit where it told me how many hours the 'team member' would have to work.  16 - whoopee dooo.  Perfect I thought. Until I read the bit that said that the 'team member' had to be 'fully flexible' between the hours of 5am and 5pm Mon-Sat.  Seriously?........................................

Maybe I am wildly out of touch with the job requirements in todays world................................

.......................BUT...............................

I have absolutely no intention of applying for any job where the employers value their staff so little that they think they are just sitting around waiting for whatever shifts they can get in a 12 hour period.  But whoopee doo - if, I had actually applied for this job and got it, my minimum wage of £7.20 would have gone up to £7.47 after 6 months.  Oh and one of the 'benefits' was free tea & coffee.

Needless to say I have not applied for the job of 'team member'.

.........................However I'm still a bit puzzled as to how 'chewing gum, greasy haired, fat person with stains all down her overall,' managed to get a job there???